Role of Men: You are One in a Billion

One. That is the number of events during the AWID Forum about the role of men. And it was not even announced in the programme. Today during lunch-break, a group of men presented the book “Mobilising Men in Practice. Challenging sexual and gender-based violence ininstitutional settings.” A central theme is the brief discussion today: why would men be involved in gender equality and women's rights?

(Photo: father and son, meanwhile mom is working)

Satish Kumar Singh from the Centre for Health and Social Justice  that leads the Mobilizing Men programme in India: “We have this culture of swiping violence against women under the carpet. We raise these cases, we make them public and break the silence. Men who already react against violence against women join us in our work, because these men are not supported by society. They feel isolated and are given the sense that they are not real men. Together we challenge hegemonic aggressive masculinity. Those men that don’t fall in this category, feel like they don’t fit in and they have problems. So we support them. We face hesitations by religious groups, peer-pressure, and family pressure. But slowly we see that non-aggressive masculinity is getting more accepted. Because men loose out in patriarchy as well, and have a lot to gain when challenging it.”

Jerker Edström from IDS and FAWCETT (closing the inequality between wo...men, since 1866!), co-author of the book: “What do men have to gain from equality? Well, not all men gain. When you are at the top of the tree, when you loose power, you loose. As do women who are at the top of the tree. But what have men got to gain? Social relationships, better lives with their wives, with their children. And also a relief from patriarchal pressure, sharing how  you feel with your partner, not having to live up to pressure.”

Philip Otieno from Men for Gender Equality Now (MEGEN) Kenya explained about several initiatives, such as where taxi drivers have developed their own code of practice to protect their female customers from sexual violence. Or the Men as fathers project, which aims to collect 1 million autographs of men who love and care for their families, to spread this the message. “I am here because I have a stake in this. As a man I feel I need a peaceful environment, in which my mother, my sister, any female relative, is under threat of violation, I don’t want that.”

Jerker Edström: “We have been asked several times: what are you doing here, is this really your space? Well, we are at our place here, we feel comfortable and at home. I don’t apologize for being here. I never say, I am sorry I am a man. I am a feminist. To link up with social movements that fight for justice, that’s why we are here. To link with women's movements and sexual rights movements.”

“Some women ask me: why should women go through the pain of involving men when the men don’t want to? I personally think it is not up to women to involve men, it should be men themselves. Men must hold men to account. Furthermore, women are also capable of making patriarchal points. The notion that because you are a woman, you are progressive, doesn’t stand. This is the point with intersectionality. We have to look at the hetero-normative straight jackets of development. How do we undo those? In 2006 we brought academics and activists together to discuss the gender myths and stereotypes of men, as well as of women? Stereotypes of women in development are of carrying the water and working at home, when men are drinking away the money in the bar. This book is about the next level, with concrete examples of how it is working with men in different institutions, addressing these gender stereotypes.”

How to take it forward after the publication?  Getting in contact with other initiatives working with men from around the world, is essential. MenEngage has been working for 10 years and work is going on. National alliances are building, as more and more local organizations join. 


= Joni van de Sand =